wat is happiness?

as i grow up, i feel tat things gt tougher n complicated. especially life. for nw, i don even knw wat is a true happiness. ppl mux b feeling awkward tat a sc1 student don even knw wat is the meaning of happiness. frm small til nw, many things happen in our life, of course. memories- tats wat v keep in our mind n heart. when i was stil a kid, i rmb tat my parents took vry gud care on me. they gave me wat i wan and taught me wat i should knw. as a result, i knw to crawl, walk and talk earlier than other ordinary kid. dad wanted to send me for kindergarten when i was 4, bt yet he worried tat i wil b bullied as my body size is vry small, nt like nw. xD so, i only went for study at 5. during my preschool time, i was an intelligent kid, tat was wat my parents used to say. i had talent in art. however, after few years, i stopped my art class. i forgotten y edi. when i was having my primary skul education, dad wil taught me personally when hes free. i stil rmb tat i gt caned if i couldnt answer wat dad asked. i wil b vry scare n cried whenever he called me for revision time. bt nw, i knw wat he did was actually rite. its all for my own gud. thus, i gt excellent results for upsr n other examinations in skul. teachers had been calling me the top student. == at the beginning of secondary skul life, everything went smoothly.. until i mixed up wit those *frens*. i gone bad. unfortunately, i gt appendix summor on may. my results drop drop n drop. dad gt disappointed bt he understood wat i had gone thru. he didnt scold me. bt i think he was scolding himself coz he was unable to teach me d. he gt his education until standard 6 only. i cant cope wit wat teachers taught anymore. its a sad thing. on 2009, first day of skul, i was sent to 3B. i gt vry angry n sad. few mins later, i was asked to go back to 3A. WTF? tis is nt fun, k? i felt so ashamed. things din changed, i stil gt poor results. 1 month b4 pmr, i studied for the exam. there were many taechers helping me. THX! n.. i gt 7As for pmr. mum cried. she was too hapi. LOL.. for the first time. i felt excited coz i cant blif tat i wil gt straight As. form 4.. i studied hard at the beginning of the year to maintain wat i had. after few months, i gt lost again. damn! nw, its edi 2011- SPM. i cant reli do well in my add maths n chemistry. i luv add maths bt add maths don seem to b loving me. for chemistry, sry to b say tat i hate u the most! bt, no matter hw i hate studying, i hav to study oso, its my last exam. i wan my parents to b proud of me once again. lastly, PAPA N MAMA.. i luv u. bt i jux dono hw to express out my feelings. sry tat i always broke both of ur heart. i m actually stil seeking the way to create happiness tat wil lead to my success. i promise i wont make u 2 disappointed anymore. thx for wat u all had gave to me.

simple day

woke up at 5.45am to take bath, going for amali course. the course starts at 9am. better than the first course. i don feel sleepy! the lecturer is funny! he gt bald n shiny head. he talked lots of funny jokes as well. xD jux listened for 3 hours den back jor coz uncle said the outdoor amali, no nid listen one. LOL.. so, me n theng stopped at the face to face noodle house near kp at abt 1 smtg. had our lunch there. i ordered sichuan noodle. my goodness, its damn spicy! after today, i do nt dare to eat sichuan food anymore. too spicy until my stomach like having volcano eruption. walked to kp after eating n theng bought her stuff. i gt ntg to buy. miracle. =D den, v went home tgt. feeling tired. go online til nw, i m here-BLOG~ arg! i stil nt feeling well coz of tat spicy noodle jux nw. bt it tastes great! lol.. seriously. i m reli the face to face noodle house top 1 fans ar. ytd went, today went. ^^ wil go there again soon, i think. gt addicted. xD its 3 smtg d nw, should take my bath ler. byeee =)

officially 17

its 26/5. i don get to out wit sumone, expected. god decides everything =X nt reli a nice day as dad busy working too. thought wil b great. last year of secondary, man. bt, at the end? disappointed. conclusion, never expect too much. by the way, thx to shirley babe for accompanied me whole day. sori for showing no sign of hapi. i don mean to do tat. bt, i jux.. don feel gud. tis year, my wishes don cum true. saddy~ nvm pa, forget bout it. next year don think so much better. present? i get none today. ahhaa.. vry funny. fake me. anything lar, let today passed. tomoro wil b a better day. =) c the pic above? titled: BIG BARBIE EYES. tats wat my frens said. thx to my lens. xD gt ntg to write ler. gudbye!

indirect confession ♥♥♥

♫ its over ♫

all those torturing exams are over! left one more maths 2 tat i wil take it as eating peanuts. open the shell, get the nuts n throw away. today chemi n history 1 was horrible. i think i finished them in jux.. 30 mins? OMG! nt as if i knw, i don even knw wat the crap the question talking about.. so, i jux POOF! tembak. history paper 2 was pretty cool, i created my own history. =D today's exam finished at 1.25pm, bt v stil cant go back. so, sit down n talk talk wit my frens. suddenly, it rains. reminds me of wat u said again == i always ask myself, y r u always in my mind? y? i juz too care bout u. i m wori bout ur health, especially. god, bless u. today is 24. 24/5 was my unlucky day few years ago, bt the curse had gone when i was 15, if i m nt mistaken. it mux b sumone tat had sweep away tat spell for me. LOL.. 2 more days. it would nt b a nice day, i think. feeling disappointed of smtg. btw, i don think i m goin to skul tat day. don wanna c ppl whole day wishing me n i hav to keep smiling like a retarded person. sori to say tat, bt i reli don like to smile. wish u gud luck for ur exam on thurs. giv u all my luck. as i don nid any luck tat day. haiz.. feeling so boring. wat to do on thurs? sleep? game? study? any idea? 4.30 til 6.30 wil b having bio, only tat 2 hours wil make my day. others? i reli dono wat to do. might b pondering at home? silly. ok ler lar, i nidda go bath nw. feeling sleepy. zzz~ CHAOZ! =)

history

it had been almost a month i did nt update my bloggy. y? i m jux too lazy. haha.. history? ya! tats my title for tis post. wat i wanna talk? erm, history of life perhaps? many things happened during tis whole month. suprisingly, i gt numb 9 in class for my setara 2 exam. tat was crazy! as usual, i din study. bt i jux dono y tat happened. bt nvm lar, its a gud thing btw. i wonder y m i so lucky. izzit coz i gt my lucky star? i dono.. xD n yeap yeap, my relationship wit sumone is getting better. i think she started to trust me d? =) anyway, thx for nt ignoring me although i always do stupid stuff. i knw i m jux a fool. however, watever i do, i wont expect tat u wil pay it back to me. as long as u hapi den i hapi ^^ recently, i m having my mid year exam. i gt no mood to study. prefer spending my time on game, daydreaming n other stupid stuff == so so, i knw my result gonna drop. hey pn kang, I DIN CHANGE TO HARDWORKING AS HW U SAID ME. u may b suprise to c my mid year results soon. hahaha~ wat i wish for tis term is jux pls pls, pass everything, den enof ler. =D reli crazy liao me, din study bt hope can pass. stupid mind! xD ahhaa.. 3 MORE DAYS~ ITS MY BIG DAY! hope it wil b a sweet n memorable 17th birthday. tomoro i wil b sitting for my chemi 1, history 1 & 2. o yea, chemi 1 n history 1 gonna b fun, tembak tembak. LMAO.. history 2? i should study later, don wan my paper to b as clean as its original state. history history history... wat for wan study the past? cum on government, look forward!